Menagerie

Amilia Suzanous in her natural habitat.

Suzi’s time at the zoo is almost up. Despite my noble ambition I have not kept up with her adventures as I intended. Fear not I have one more post before the Amilia Suzanous is seen no more.

Most of her time is spent in the “petting zoo” area. They no longer have the one eyed pony that I remember, but there’s an assortment of rabbits, a guinea pig, a hen and an actual pig that likes to nibble on your shoes that you can pet all for the crazy cost of $1. (Come on people the zoo itself is like $3. Talk about a cheap entertainment.)

Working at the zoo is never boring; first there are the other volunteers, mostly high school students looking to get volunteer hours, with a smattering of adults who just like working at the zoo. Then there are the employees, many of whom apparently double dip and also work at the Fresno zoo. The two groups have created a summer camaraderie of good natured teasing and messing with each other that comes with youthful high spirits and hours of working together.

In addition to the petting zoo Suzi has cleaned cages, measured meals, fed animals, dredged bathrooms (I don’t think they didn’t realize what they were unleashing), and gotten muddy head-to-toe transplanting flowers. She did however resist the urge to startle patrons and clearly announced her presence in the tall stems whenever anyone got close.

There was even an incident where a woman was escorted off the premises, like I said, never a dull moment.

But the best part of Suzi working at the zoo, are the stories she tells about the animals as you take the tour. Each cage has a tale to go with it.  For example the tortoises are surprisingly picky and will snub their food if it’s not the vegetable of their choice.

Melon, the eyes say it all.

Melon, one of the emu’s has a creepy way of coming up behind you and looking over your shoulder while cleaning the cage.

And of course the UC Merced mascot Boomer (a bobcat) resides at the zoo. (UCM is my current employer ergo this important to know.)

If you want a personalized tour that includes names and stories of the animals, or just want to watch a small pig try to eat your toes, take this Monday/Tuesday off and visit Suzi at the Merced Zoo.

Peeves and Puzzles

Apparently I have some snarkiness that needs to be expressed. 

He vs She

My education taught me to understand the universal he. He doesn’t always simply mean male; it can be a universal term for anyone breathing. I understand this may frustrate people in today’s society, however it made sense to me as a child, she requires an extra letter and if you're going to use both he and she that’s an extra five-six letters. Who wants to write more than they have to?

As you (authors) tend to make it clear when addressing a specific sex, please stop insulting my intelligence, I am fully capable of comprehending when you use he in a universal inclusive sense without feeling offended. Switching between the two makes you come across as associating characteristics with gender, or as trying too hard.

Coloring Books

-          By Heidi

When they include giant crayons with coloring books that have details? How are you supposed to use that monstrosity to color say, buttons on a coat, and stay within the lines?

Childhood Rhymes

It’s funny what sticks with you from childhood. Thanks to the rhyme “step on a crack, you’ll break your mother’s back” I still avoid cracks when I walk. Not because I think I’ll break Mom’s back, but because it’s become a game to try to avoid cracks as much as possible without altering my stride. Sadly, this game periodically turns into a compulsion that becomes an unpleasant nuisance to someone used to scanning the ground for weeds when they walk.

Descent

If you are from South America you are of Hispanic descent. If your ancestors were from Spain you are of Hispanic descent. However, if you’re ancestors were from Portugal or North Africa, you are simply considered white. What? 

Suzi, Zoo Exhibit A

Ladies and Gentlemen you can now see the one and only Suzanne Alvernaz at the zoo! I kid you not folks this rare popular attraction is at the Merced Zoo two days a week. Don’t miss this opportunity to see her in her natural habitat.

Horribly photo manipulation I know. All I had were
Paint and Publisher, & refining was taking too long.
This an altered picture.
In case you missed that...

Seriously though, my little sister is at the zoo. She’s volunteering their part time this summer. She says she’s an “animal janitor.” But I know it hasn't been all stinky, here’s the tidbits I know; she’s fed hissing cockroaches (fun…not), the miniature foxes like to run up the sides of their cage (apparently this can be a startling if you’re not expecting it), and one of the monkey’s broke a hip.

But the best thing so far was when she cemented this blog post. Last night sh was talking to a friend and said, “you can come see me at the zoo!” I’d already been thinking of using that line for this post but when she said it, the tiny thought that might be “mean” evaporated. Of course she instantly started laughing and protesting “that’s not what I mean”, but we all know the truth.

I’m hoping to get some more good stories out of her this summer. If I do I will post them here for your entertainment and enjoyment. If you’re looking for something to do you should pop in and say hi. She’s there  in the afternoon on Tuesday and Wednesday. 

After all it’s not every day you personally know a zoo specimen.