My resume is out of date, I don't even know where I'm going to put my most recent work, and I'd forgotten about those dumb cover letters that you slave over, trying to remember what the heck was told to you in college. How in blazes do you make your long string of random jobs sound appealing let alone make any sense!?!
I'm afraid my inner imp came out today while I struggled with this. I'm really tempted to send out the following letter.
Dear Blah Blah Blah,
I am applying for the __________ position. As you can see I
have a wide variety of skills that do not pertain to anything in particular.
Most of my current work experience has been in agriculturally related fields,
retail and ministry. Unfortunately my current position has very limited part
time hours and I need to find an additional means of income.
I currently am creating and running a Sunday morning
children’s program, coordinating the volunteers for that program, assisting to
run a children’s mid-week program, as well as participating and hostessing
special events. I’m a team player and enjoy working with others, but I can also
work independently and get my work done in a timely manner.
I tend to find solutions outside the box, love opportunities
to be creative, occasionally have a brief imp of mischief flash in my eyes.
I have a generally pleasant demeanor, have obtained my four year
degree, own my car with a valid driver’s license, have yet to be arrested, given time can eventually learn almost
anything and enjoy people most of the time.
Where am I going? Only God knows. Like most misguided fools
my age, or a bit younger actually…I am getting a bit up there in age, I still
have delusions of doing something meaningful, fun, yet making lots of money.
Oh, and my Mommy says I’m awesome. Please hire.
Thank you for your time
-
Nicole Alvernaz
At least it catches your attention. Think anyone would hire me if I sent out a letter like that?
Not bold enough... if you're gonna get their attention, you gotta go all in!
ReplyDeleteThis has some parts that would actually be good for a usual cover letter... :-)
Hahaha. You would egg me on. I'll work on making it more horrid.
ReplyDeleteHere's a good example :-)
ReplyDeletehttp://finance.yahoo.com/news/kid-sends-perfectly-blunt-cover-letter-for-wall-street-internship--and-now-tons-of-people-are-trying-to-hire-him-151518002.html
You could also try this approach, but it might not work so well (in more ways than one):
Deletehttp://www.dailyedge.ie/cover-letter-train-bear-783442-Feb2013/
The first letter just seemed right. The second, was it actually real?
ReplyDelete