Chronologically Speaking

Today at work I was asked "shouldn't you be in school?" After stating I'd been done with school for quite a while I was informed I looked about 16.

If that's the case, maybe I do act my age after all.

1 800 PRAYER?

On Saturday a co-worker received a recorded message from an 800 number saying that "they" thought God wanted them to pray for my co-worker, so to be on the prayer chain hit 0. (Or some number).

HUH?!? 

I wanted to call back and say really? God has an 800 number now?  So the whole talk to Him whenever, wherever thing is out? Now I need cell reception or I'm screwed?

And isn't an 800 number a little I don't know, boring when it comes to God. I mean come on, this is the God that once spoke through an burning inanimate object (bush), and another time used a donkey to get His point across  This is the Guy that backs a kid with rocks over a heavily armored giant. He created the kangaroo for Pete's sake, you'd think He could be a little more original than a recorded message.

I thought He was a bit more personal than that anyway. Doesn't the Bible say He knows the number of hairs on your head? Maybe He's decided to streamline?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not mocking people who actually care about others and pray for them. Prayer warriors are awesome and the church needs more of them. (Especially for people like me). If you think someone need's prayer DO IT! What are you waiting for praise, applause? If you want to let someone know you care, great, just try to do it personally. Like Jesus would. A recorded message from an 800 number is just creepy.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to say all these things. (Which is why you get my snarkiness now). When we tried to call back the call could not be completed; the number was unreachable. Thank God that's not really the way things work.

My Summer Project

Coming all too soon for my procrastinating self......

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OT8FltR6wm8&feature=youtu.be

Who Knew, I LOVE WATERMELONS!

Pretty sure I've mentioned this before, and I'm positive I will mention it again, but it's amazing how much fun the simple things in life can be. They may be more enjoyable than something complex.

Take for instance an over ripe watermelon. Growing up in CA I'm afraid I've become a bit snobbish about the condition of my fruits and veggies. Growing up in the country I've become rather an elitist. Gone is the age of even a wrinkled our sour apple in winter being a treat. Grown and transported all over the world, even out of season one can enjoy fresh fruit whenever. But nothing can change that the best fruit (and veggies I suppose) is fresh off the tree, vine or out of the ground.

Tuesday night, Em decided we should eat the pick the watermelon from the garden and eat it with our dinner. I pointed out Aunt Judy had one in the fridge from Costco, but apparently it's not the same. I had my doubts, the melon had been "ready" for a bit and I wasn't sure I'd want to eat it. But it did seem like a waste to leave it there so I quickly thumped it to make sure it sounded like a 3 year-olds stomach.

Since it passed the sound test I plucked it and carried it inside where Emily promptly cut it. Sure enough my fears were true the prize was "going south." Mushy is the only way I know how to explain it. I despise mushy fruit. My friend however, put a cheerful face on things and very diplomatically told me it was very sugary. Uh-huh.....

Being there were two of us, we knew the entire melon would be waaaaay too much. (Aunt Judy was out for the evening). Somehow we got on the topic of throwing half of it out my 2nd story bedroom window. Unfortunately new screens were recently put in so that nixed that. However, the idea of smashing the watermelon delighted me, and I decided we were going to do it. Even if it was less than epic.

Our first attempt was to throw it at my bounce back hoping it would rebound and smash. Problem, I currently do not have sandbags holding it down and the melon was too much weight for the light metal frame. Our second attempt was to simply throw it on the ground and I must say it worked smashingly. (Just for you Aunt Judy).

 It gave a satisfying thwap as it broke into smithereens. In that instant I knew growing watermelons had been worth it. The ones I'd given away had made me feel like I hadn't wasted money. (Can't remember if I bought a watermelon plant this year or if they grew from last years dismal attempts. If I did it was a grand total of 89 cents!) But it wasn't until I smashed that puppy that I delighted in the fruits of my labor.

If you've had a bad day and need a pick me up, destroy a watermelon. It's simple, sticky and rejuvenating. Don't believe me, give it a try, you may be surprised by the joys of being artless.


Disclaimer: This author of this site does not encourage the vandalism or destruction of other's property. All watermelon smashing should be done in one's own yard.